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Ferrari not done yet handing out gifts
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Ferrari not done yet handing out gifts
Posted By: James Allen  |  14 Dec 2010   |  12:51 am GMT  |  98 comments

Ferrari put its end of season disappointments behind it and held a Christmas party over the weekend in Maranello and the drivers dressed up as Santa Claus and handed out presents to local children.

There was also a show based on the children’s character Geronimo Stilton.

The photo commemorating the event is pretty surreal; Fernando Alonso seems a little self conscious on the right, next to test driver Jules Bianchi, Giancarlo Fisichella (centre) is thinking about calling Vijay Mallya to get his old job back, while Felipe Massa looks comfortable sandwiched between President Montezemolo and a six foot rodent.

Your wittiest captions, please

Photo: Ferrari

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1

Prancing Reindeer Panto Productions Presents

“Who gives an F duct”

Starring:

Fernando Alonso as Cardinal Ximenez of Spain

Jules Bianchi as Brian of Nazareth

Giancarlo Fisichella as Ebenezer Scrooge

Felipe Massa as Tiny Tim

Rob Smedley as Fredo the giant rat

Written and directed by Luca Brasi Di Montezemolo

December 6th to December 24th at the Place de la Concorde Paris Playhouse.

2

Seriously guys, you have Felipe “Santa” baby and nobody’s thought to do this yet? Well here’s my shot at the song sung by Fernando to Felipe (with backing vocals by Rob Smedley)

Felipe baby, slip a podium under the tree, you see

I’ve been “faster than you”

Felipe baby, I’ll overtake in Germany tonight

Think of all the wins you’ve missed

Think of all the pit babes you haven’t kissed

Next year I could be oh so good

Let me past and make all the fans miffed

Felipe cutie, there’s one thing I really do need, the deed

To the whole red car team

Felipe cutie, I’ll overtake down the pit-lane tonight

Felipe baby, forgot to mention one little thing, a win

I don’t mean one deserved

Felipe baby, I’ll overtake in Germany tonight

3

Alonso: “The things I have to do, just because I’m sponsored by Santa-and-deer”.

4

+1

Awful, but wonderfully so 😉

5

And Now For Something Completely Different:

First photo:

Alonso to Bianchi: Evenin’ squire! Are you a goer? Ay, know wot I mean, know wot I mean, nudge, nudge, know wot I mean, say na more.

Bianchi: I beg your pardon?

Alonso: Do ya go? Ay? Know wot I mean, know wot I mean, do ya go, ay?

Bianchi: I sometimes go….

Alonso: I bet you do, I’ll bet you do, say na more, say na more! Know wot I mean? Nudge, nudge.

Bianchi: I’m afraid I don’t quite follow you…

Alonso: Follow me, follow me! That’s good, that’s good! A nod’s as good as a wink to a blind bat…

Bianchi: Look, are you selling something?

Alonso: Selling, selling, very good, very good, know wot I mean… Umm, are you a sport? Ay? Like games, do ya, been around a bit, have ya, he asked him knowingly… say na more, say na more…

Bianchi: Look, are you trying to insinuate something?

Alonso: Nah, nah, no, no, no, no, no, no. Yes.

Bianchi: Well?

Alonso: Well, I mean, err. You’re an experienced driver. You’ve raced cars. You’ve won races, championships, y’know – without having to give away victories to your teammate…

Bianchi: Yes.

Massa and Fisi: What’s it like?

6

Picture #1 – caption

To show that there were no hard feelings, Ferrari invited Vitaly Petrov (far left) to the company’s Christmas party. Also in attendance was Max Moseley (third from right) who gatecrashed the event after hearing that there would be other adults playing dress-ups.

Picture #2 – thought bubble over Massa’s head:

When I read in my contract “agrees to hand out gifts to spoiled little brats”, I thought they meant this gig…

7

Alonso: I thought Lauda left Ferrari ages ago

Massa: If Luca mentions my brother again I’ll sool Niki here onto him

8

Some of the previous suggestions are far better than this one but it’s all good fun.

Second Photo: Yes, we confess Eddie [Jordan]. We’re sorry. It was theft – we did take your stock of Coventry City (the team Eddie supposedly supports) scarves!

9

It’s Luca’s Neverland Maranelloland moment! He waited all year for it.

10

Felipe > mr stilton. Those trousers you’re wearing are dreadful. Where did you get them?

Geronimo > eddie Jordan.

———–
Or felippe to Luca.

We said you were to dress as dangermouse, not Rodney dangerfield.

11

Ex Ferrari team principle and current FIA President Jean Todt makes a surprise appearance dressed in swanky yellow raincoat at the Ferrari Christmas party.

12

Felipe Massa, seen here between a rat and a 6 ft rodent in a yellow suit.

or

Ferrari Christmas party eagerly awaits the Red Bull delivery!

13

Out of all the above, Kenny’s first reply is still the best by far: A big LoL!

14

Ferrari thought that it was only right to end the year to carry on handing out gifts. They finished the year handing the trophy to Red Bull and Sebastian Vettel, now they are handing it out to kids in Maranello, although I do wonder if they are Ferrari based merchandise.

15

First picture, Massa to Rob Smedley dressed up in the rat:

“I NEED A WHITE VISOR. Otherwise I cannot see anything”

“Felipe baby stay cool. Just open your eyes…”

16

Fernando doesn’t look very alonso-ho-ho does he?

18

Photo 2:

Felipe: “Hey Nando, where are all your toys?”

19

Fernando: “I’ve read my contract and it looks like Felipe will be gifting me next years championship!”

Felipe: “Hmm, I smell a rat . . .”

20

Luca DiMontezemelo gets Niki Lauda back to give surprise Christmas team pep talk…

21

Pic 1:

LdM: Felipe, meet your replacement.

22

Niki Lauda Rejoins Ferrari as Brand Ambassador.

23

“Felipe. Fernando is more generous than you! Can you confirm you understand?”

or

“WHITE BEARD!I NEED THE WHITE BEARD!!”

“Felipe baby be cool!”

24

Alonso drives for the red team in their red cars and now he has a red face.

Is it just me or does massa seem like a 4 yr old emotion wise? On the rollarcoaster he seemed to be loving it, now he sseem quite happy in a santa costume being photographed.

On a side dark note… could this be due to the crash at all? I know some people with brain injuries ‘loose certain emotions’ per say and when experiencing them afterwards show the emotion is a much less ‘sophisticated (sorry, really wrong word, but can’t think of a better one)’ way? Only other TV person I can think of who has had this was Hammond from TopGear, and I think I can remember he writing or saying somewhere about that he experienced certain emotions differently and from a new start after his crash.

I know not everyone is like that, and I can’t remember Massa previous to his crash much (ignoring 2008 as it was a serious championship year).

25

Alonso: is hamilton going to be penalised of his christams presents?

Alonso’s engineer: lets concentrate on our party fernando.

26

“Jerry, DangerMouse is faster than you. Can you confirm you understand this message?”

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