Posted on January 27, 2014
McLaren

We’ve had a huge response from readers about these new look 2014 F1 cars, with getting on for 1,000 comments over the weekend.

And one noticeable strand of comment has been fans trying to figure out what the unusual noses on these cars look like. The right buzzword to describe this new look design is something F1 commentators and media will be desperately searching for ahead of the new season, so we’d like to throw them a lifeline by asking fans to come up with a new buzzword for the F1 noses.

Here are a few of the suggestions we’ve had for lookalikes along with a few of our own…

Dustbuster
Kenneth M’boy says: “The Ferrari looks like a Dustbuster, Dyson sponsorship going begging there, Luca”


Cartoon characters
Cyril Sneer, a character from The Raccoons cartoon series has been suggested as a dead ringer for one or two of the cars.

Another suggestion from Kenneth M’boy: “I always think of Jughead from Archie comics when I see that image of the McLaren.

Mammal lookalikes
The good old Anteater is a name that has cropped up on numerous occasions in the last few days, for obvious reasons.

Another popular suggestion has been the Bottle Nose Dolphin, which does bear more than a passing resemblance to the new Williams.

A few of our own

Looking at the new McLaren MP4-29, we think that it is a dead ringer for that popular comic actor from the Carry On films of the 1960s and ’70s, Kenneth Williams. Separated at birth?

Meanwhile, the Lotus E22 has prompted a few walrus comparisons but we reckon the front end bears a startling resemblance to a tuning fork laid flat.

And in terms of anteaters, we’re going for the specific in the case of the Ferrari and choosing the Aardvark from the late-’60s TV cartoon, The Ant and the Aardvark. Just change blue to red and voilà…

So, what do you reckon TV pundits should be calling this year’s models? Is it the Ferrari Dustbuster or the F14 T Aardvark, the Lotus Walrus or the Tuning Fork? Keep the suggestions coming and we’ll see if we can’t properly christen these new noses.

 

Help us Find the perfect buzzword for these “new look” F1 cars
284 Responses

  1.   1. Posted By: CYeo
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 2:59 pm 

    Leafblowers.

    Afterall, they both use gas to make a lot of noise and hot air.

    [Reply]

    Robert in San Diego Reply:

    I do not understand why everyone is so reactionary ! I seriously disliked the step noses but I like the Ferrari best and McLaren second this year. I am sure they will change throughout the year but at least they look fast.

    [Reply]

    Adriano Reply:

    I agree! I find it hilarious that an F1 fan would get his/her little knickers in a twist because the cars aren’t as pretty. I think the new noses look really purposeful and, in any case, I would refer to the old adage that a beautiful car is fast car.

    [Reply]

    bobster Reply:

    I think the cars shown thus far are not as aesthetically delightful as, say, the 1978 Lotus, but they are better looking than the step nosed cars. And more diverse! When I first started following F1 the cars all looked different from each other. The Tyrell and the Lotus were the front-runners, but they were very different. The 2014 cars are not that different from each other, but they are pleasingly diverse. I expect that over time the aero guys will home in on the one optimal solution and the cars will all look alike again, but for now lets enjoy the diversity.

    J.Danek Reply:

    “I do not understand why everyone is so reactionary !” > > > Here, let me help you:

    B/c these 2014 “anteater” noses are FUGLY!!!

    Step-noses (especially the F2012) were gorgeous, by comparison.

    [Reply]

    J.Danek Reply:

    btw, James:

    I think it’s cool to create character-associations for each 2014 car specifically, but what you’re ultimately hoping for is a single term to reference the entire class of designs, no?

    If that’s the case, I like:

    * Anteater;

    * Aardvark; or

    * Elephant-trunk!!!

    En1gma Reply:

    Ferrari/Merc: Snout or ‘droop snoot’
    FI/STR: finger, or maybe anteater
    Red Bull: keel

    Jeff J Reply:

    F1 reminds me of that Kafka novel, every time they change its gets worse. last really good looking car was the 155 Lotus in ’69.

    [Reply]

    Kimi4WDC Reply:

    2005 McLaren what a car.

    Steve Zodiac Reply:

    Shame Dunlop aren’t the tyre suppliers, they look a bit like “Ground Hogs”

    [Reply]


  2.   2. Posted By: Random 79
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:00 pm 

    The problem is that there isn’t any one thing that they all resemble, so at the risk of going slightly left field why not call them Kaiju noses?

    Same source, same DNA, but wildly different results.

    [Reply]

    Sebee Reply:

    Now you’d have to explain Kaiju noses. Doesn’t help really.

    [Reply]

    expatpom Reply:

    See movie “Pacific Rim” – Kaiiju means “monster” in Japanese I think and they are all different lol

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    So they say, but it also means “strange creature”.

    Fits perfectly :)

    Sebee Reply:

    Oh I see. Weird Japanese thing.

    Since that’s where you’re heading…they have weird Tentacle Porn in Japan in attempt to be proper and not show explicit sexual content, how about Tentacle Noses then? That could work.

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Could that be the yet to be revealed Newey RB10 nose? :)

    [Reply]

    Shane Reply:

    Awesome!

    [Reply]

    joe149 Reply:

    I’m betting that by mid-season, the similarities will be a lot greater. There are all stabs in the dark in a way, no?

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Well they will be in Bahrain and Singapore ;)

    [Reply]


  3.   3. Posted By: AuraF1
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:02 pm 

    This is just to help avoid the Freudian slip for commentators of, ‘welcome to formula wang, I mean penis!..I mean…oh never mind…’

    I expect many blush moments when they talk about ‘slipping one up the inside’…

    We may have a pit to car radio bleeping system now to avoid swearing – will we see pixelation of ‘offensive’ car noses to spare family audiences?

    [Reply]

    Jeff J Reply:

    +1

    [Reply]

    D@X Reply:

    Can imagine the commentators making a meal out of it already, look at the Ferrari sniffing the Mclarens rear, only one car making a double penetration to the corner and that’s the Lotus.

    [Reply]


  4.   4. Posted By: Peter Dron
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:02 pm 

    F1ngugly

    [Reply]


  5.   5. Posted By: Dave Sheppard
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:04 pm 

    I think they could all be covered by one name ‘The Michaels’ – lots of different nose jobs, all bad.

    [Reply]

    D@X Reply:

    +1 falling of my chair

    [Reply]


  6.   6. Posted By: Adam Taylor
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:05 pm 

    I think that the Lotus is following the two pronged approach but the rest could be called the ‘Rostrum”, which is the name of a dolphins nose but is also another name for the podium which I think ties in perfectly.

    [Reply]


  7.   7. Posted By: hippyneil
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:09 pm 

    I still think “Proboscis Monkey” rather than “anteater”, although the generic “Fugly” still applies to most of them.

    [Reply]

    deancassady Reply:

    how about “the fly”?

    [Reply]

    Adrian Newey Jnr Reply:

    This.

    [Reply]


  8.   8. Posted By: DonSimon
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:10 pm 

    Cyrano de Bergerac

    [Reply]


  9.   9. Posted By: Gordon
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:12 pm 

  10.   10. Posted By: Ashley
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:14 pm 

    One for the children of the 90′s: Otis The Aardvark

    [Reply]


  11.   11. Posted By: Al
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:14 pm 

    NUGLY

    [Reply]


  12.   12. Posted By: AlexD
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:15 pm 

    Mutant cars, aliens, Grisly-cars, UFOs

    [Reply]


  13.   13. Posted By: viv
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:20 pm 

    How about “pages of a biology textbook”… ?

    [Reply]


  14.   14. Posted By: Paul H
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:21 pm 

    The Ferrari is Cyril Sneer, the Williams is Kenneth Williams or Jim Rosenthal or The Count, the Lotus is The Rabbit (think Anne Summers), the McLaren is Alice (the Goon, from Popeye). That said I think they will all evolve from the start of testing so names will have to adjust too.

    Can’t wait to see the Merc and RBR now to see if there is any designs similar across teams or no two the same. Be great to see every car with a different interpretation and the development race that would create.

    [Reply]


  15.   15. Posted By: Delgado
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:21 pm 

    Much as the English language itself is constantly reinventing itself so it is
    with Formula One. In that spirit why not
    claim a new meaning for an old and very
    seldom used term? ‘Dynasic’ comes to mind.

    The dynasic cars of the 2014 Formula One season.

    From the Latin terms ‘Dynamica’(Dynamic)
    and ‘Nasus’(Nose).

    Formula One renewing and reinventing the English language? Why not. It surely beats
    twerking our way towards another selfie!

    [Reply]


  16.   16. Posted By: Jock Ulah
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:22 pm 

    Mal-do-Naso?
    [mod]
    Whatever . . .

    Anyway, I recommend this firm to design a nice garage for them . . .
    http://www.archdaily.com/452161/zaha-hadid-defends-qatar-stadium-from-critics/

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Looks more like a Brazilian stadium to me.

    [Reply]

    Jock Ulah Reply:

    Indeed, you wax lyrical . . .

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Nah, I wax comical.

    I’m not nearly talented enough for lyrical :)


  17.   17. Posted By: Delgado
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:23 pm 

    Well, so much for my spelling and syntax!

    [Reply]


  18.   18. Posted By: jono
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:25 pm 

    Yes well, I do think the word “sneer” as in cyril sneer describes it very well. You could even say “the FIA forced them to sneer”.

    As for the lotus with it’s black colour scheme I’d go for the Stag Beetle. Or just call it a Beetle for short. All they need then is a change of engine supplier. The new VW Beetle Lotus anyone?

    [Reply]


  19.   19. Posted By: HerrE
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:26 pm 

    Well I think it’s rather easy, we just recycle an excisting word:

    Probe + Idiotic = Probiotic!

    FIA aren’t as smart as they want us to belive, and it still remains insufficient to prove a cause and effect relationship between safety and this new look. Equivalent with probiotic products, that is.

    [Reply]

    Sebee Reply:

    Have you driven a Ford Probe lately?

    [Reply]

    HerrE Reply:

    Probebly not…

    [Reply]

    Bradley Reply:

    Not too far from ‘proboscis’

    [Reply]


  20.   20. Posted By: Karim
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:29 pm 

    I think the buzzword for Ferrari has to be the dust buster. The Ferrari “dust buster” would just sound so cool coming from Brundle’s voice. There may be other buzzwords, but this one just hits it home and all casual fans who don’t know much of the sport will even laugh. No point overcomplicating it by coming up with a cartoon character that only a minority in Britain have watched- and that hardly anyone knows around the globe. No one will find that funny. The Ferrari dust buster or the Lotus walrus are pretty good as they are. The McLaren actually doesn’t look that bad- so we can give them a break ;)

    [Reply]


  21.   21. Posted By: DB4Tim
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:30 pm 

    Flugly

    [Reply]


  22.   22. Posted By: Bill Nuttall
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:32 pm 

    Let’s not beat around the bush here, the McLaren and Williams both look like they have human male reproductive organ stuck on the front!

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Sounds like you are beating around the bush.

    James, word of warning: This is going to downhill very, very fast ;)

    [Reply]

    unF1nnished business Reply:

    Exactly…I see an excellent opportunity for condom sponsorship this year! Maybe the Ferrari might want to look at Viagra.

    [Reply]

    Bradley Reply:

    Just think of what Lotus could manage…

    [Reply]

    Martin Reply:

    Nah, Viagra would have to sponsor a BLUE car,
    are you listening Williams ?

    [Reply]

    Hendo Reply:

    They’re spending all their cash on Nascar

    Sasidharan Reply:

    Lucky we don’t have head-on collisions in F1
    ;)

    [Reply]


  23.   23. Posted By: Olli
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:33 pm 

    Since the regulations now make it illegal for cars to blow, they now suck, instead. The vacuum cleaner Ferrari, anyway.

    You know what the “T” stands for in F14 T? Turkey. Gobble gobble. There, I said it.

    [Reply]


  24.   24. Posted By: Rich In Norway
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:33 pm 

    Fugly.

    [Reply]


  25.   25. Posted By: Iwan
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:36 pm 

    Are you allowed to say fugly on the air? If not I’d go with not-so-classic-looking-monstrosity or NSCLM for short. Catchy.

    [Reply]

    James Allen Reply:

    Maybe on HBO, but not on BBC for sure!!

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    So just out of curiosity and purely for research purposes, what could you get away with in relation to these cars on the BBC?

    [Reply]

    James Allen Reply:

    Don’t get me into Roger Melly territory…

    Mark Hughes – ex Autosport writer and Martin B’s and my helper in the comm box in ITV days – used to always try to do that !

    Tim Reply:

    you can say mine
    Flugly

    [Reply]


  26.   26. Posted By: iiro
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:36 pm 

    They are Weevils.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Weevil

    McLaren is a Wheat Weevil while the Ferrari is the Boll Weevil. With over 60,000 species I’m sure we will be able to name accurately each and every of the 2014 F1 models.

    [Reply]

    Al Reply:

    Which is the lesser of two weevils?

    [Reply]

    iiro Reply:

    Based on todays running that would be the McLaren!

    [Reply]


  27.   27. Posted By: Kenneth Iversen
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:36 pm 

    Sniffers

    [Reply]

    Jono Reply:

    Oh this is the one. I can hear the commentators now:

    “Check out the sniffer on the ferrari vs the williams”

    lol

    [Reply]

    Sylvester Reply:

    +1

    [Reply]


  28.   28. Posted By: darren reid
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:39 pm 

    The Proboscis Era …. Has a great ring :-D

    [Reply]

    Rod Matheson Reply:

    These cars give us a double dose of the “Jimmies…….Durante style”.

    [Reply]

    Rich C Reply:

    No one remembers Jimmie Durante! ;p

    [Reply]

    WalterBob Reply:

    Wait I do! Oh never mind..

    super seven Reply:

    yeah, the Schnozzer cars.

    [Reply]


  29.   29. Posted By: DB
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:39 pm 

    Like pre washed denim the Ferrari look should be called the ‘pre crashed’ look.

    Williams and Mclaren ‘John Thomas’

    Lotus ‘Bike Rack’

    All could be simply classed as abominations! I wouldn’t want to be trying to sell posters of these anyway!

    [Reply]


  30.   30. Posted By: Sebee
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:41 pm 

    I think we just have to call them “needle noses”

    I can’t see them being called by another brand(like dustbuster) or cartoon character, which will only belittle F1 and give free exposure to those items.

    [Reply]


  31.   31. Posted By: Ryan
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:41 pm 

    sorry James, but all my suggestions will no doubt get me banned from posting ever again.

    [Reply]

    James Allen Reply:

    Best keep your powder dry then!

    [Reply]


  32.   32. Posted By: Lez Martin
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:41 pm 

    For me, the Ferrari is akin to a Manta Ray, the Lotus a shaver plug, and the others. thus far, depending on length of snout, either a Bottle nose or River Dolphin, the McLaren, in some ways, a Harrier jump jet….

    [Reply]


  33.   33. Posted By: oskaalb
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:43 pm 

    I think Ferrari F14T Dustbuster is spot on. Williams FW37 Bottle Nose Dolphin is good too, but a little long. I also suggest we use the name Lotus E22 Fork Lift. Maybe Pastor and Romain can use it to lift away other cars rather than crash into them?

    [Reply]

    James Allen Reply:

    Like the forklift one!

    [Reply]

    Paddy man Reply:

    How about pallet truck..

    [Reply]

    darren Reply:

    Mee 2

    [Reply]


  34.   34. Posted By: CarlH
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:47 pm 

    I can think of several ‘buzzwords’.

    Unfortunately none are suitable for public consumption….

    [Reply]


  35.   35. Posted By: Nick Lynn
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 3:49 pm 

    Since it’s all about the nose perhaps we need to think about that: The’Snozzle’?

    I’m sure someone will come up with a snappier soundbite.

    [Reply]


  36.   36. Posted By: RAV4 Drivers Club
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:00 pm 

    Definately the F14 T Aardvark :) Love that!

    Lotus can’t be the Walrus, Williams already claimed that one a few years back (for a few races until the nose got blown off – portent for the Lotus) – Maybe LOTUS is no longer “Lots Of Trouble, Usually Serious” but “Lets Own Twin Under Snouts” (best I could think of on spur of moment :( )

    Anyways, I like these designs (apart from the Aardvark – pig ugly front)

    [Reply]


  37.   37. Posted By: Gilles V
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:01 pm 

    Viagra will never sponsor these car

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    At least not until they paint the McLaren light blue :)

    [Reply]


  38.   38. Posted By: Adrian Bourne
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:02 pm 

    Ferrari = leaf blower

    [Reply]


  39.   39. Posted By: AndyFov
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:08 pm 

    I can imagine someone at Lotus going “What do you mean aerodynamically efficient? I thought I was asked to design something to park a wheelbarrow in.”

    Williams have clearly subbed nose design to Jim Henson’s Workshop. Gonzo’s my best name for that, but it’s so obvious that has to be hackneyed already.

    lol @ dustbuster. Let’s hope it’s better than it looks, because Fernando’s not going to be a happy lad if that thing sucks.

    [Reply]


  40.   40. Posted By: Optimaximal
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:15 pm 

    Here’s a good one…

    “Rubbish”!

    [Reply]


  41.   41. Posted By: Nick
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:15 pm 

    That McLaren looks like a Proboscis monkey. My 6 year old daughter is a fan of the “Wild Kratts” TV show and they have an episode about the Proboscis monkeys called “Ker-Honk”.

    The McLaren is hereby called “Ker-Honk” in our family.

    [Reply]


  42.   42. Posted By: surya kumar
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:17 pm 

    HI James,

    Cant think of anything specific however the image of Force India and Mclaren are looking sleek in their respective new Avatars.

    On a side note read it on other sides that Alan Mcnish will be joining you on Radio 5 live….

    [Reply]

    James Allen Reply:

    Yes, Delighted to work with Allan again this year. He’s a terrific broadcaster and he’s unique among F1 pundits this year as he has driver hybrid turbo engines of this genre (with Audi in WEC) so he knows the game

    [Reply]

    Nigel Reply:

    Great shame the BBC has lost Gary Anderson, though.

    [Reply]


  43.   43. Posted By: Joel
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:21 pm 

    Cyril Sneer Ferrari on track is nothing to sneer at.
    Lotus is a costly forklift.

    [Reply]

    Joel Reply:

    “Lotus is a costly forklift”

    “Costly” or “cheap” will depend on whether you call it before or after Pastor bins it.

    [Reply]


  44.   44. Posted By: Andy
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:23 pm 

    The Ferrari really reminds me of former NHL tough guy Tim Hunter:

    http://www.tradingcarddb.com/Images/Cards/Hockey/48448/48448-221Fr.jpg

    So I’ll be calling it the Timmy.

    [Reply]

    Chapor Reply:

    LOL… “Timmmey!”

    [Reply]


  45.   45. Posted By: Spyros
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:23 pm 

    I had the Aardvark (from The Ant and the Aardvark) earmarked for the Williams, the idea being that they would pencil in the opening… then McLaren showed up, with the hole already in place. The color will be a problem, but that’s how marketing folks earn their money!

    [Reply]


  46.   46. Posted By: ManOnWheels
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:33 pm 

    Obviously these cars have middle finger noses, right in the face of the rule makers, all the people in attendance and the millions watching around the globe, “tune” in and let’s get ready to rumble. Oh, and while we’re at it: Look, darling, I found your Ferrari, so why don’t you start the engine and have a race around the house? Enjoy yourself..
    http://static.my.groupon-content.net/25/02/1343721290225.jpg

    [Reply]


  47.   47. Posted By: stuart ward
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:33 pm 

    just plain fugly!!

    They just get worse every year because the FIA
    never close off the loop holes that allow these aero solutions to be thought up in the first place. Bring back the jordan 191 or Mclaren MP4-20 i say.

    Regards
    Stuart Ward

    [Reply]


  48.   48. Posted By: Adam
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:43 pm 

    Dyson

    [Reply]


  49.   49. Posted By: Peter Dron
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:45 pm 

    Up to a point, I would not mind that the cars were so hideously ugly if the racing improved, but there is no chance of that.

    Heads will no doubt roll at Maranello if the F14-T (which looks like a coke snorter to me…) does not dominate the season.

    [Reply]


  50.   50. Posted By: **Paul**
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:54 pm 

    The angle change reminds me of concords nose when not in supersonic flight mode.

    I guess that’s absolutely non-offensive to any member of the audience and is actually a compliment to the designers/teams.

    :-)

    [Reply]


  51.   51. Posted By: MattH
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:55 pm 

    Droop Snoot Cars

    [Reply]


  52.   52. Posted By: Paul D
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:58 pm 

    What about an ‘Extender’ like when Alan Partridge pulls out the table and shouts “Yes, it’s an extender”?

    [Reply]


  53.   53. Posted By: JP
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 4:59 pm 

    The head on shot of the Ferrari looks just like Dunlop’s Groundhog cartoon. Have a look.

    [Reply]


  54.   54. Posted By: Justin
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:03 pm 

    Proboscis monkey

    [Reply]


  55.   55. Posted By: Richard Venn
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:04 pm 

    Stumped for this year, but looking forward to next season already where we should have the Ferrari F15T

    [Reply]


  56.   56. Posted By: Chaz
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:04 pm 

    Fugly pretty much nail it…

    [Reply]


  57.   57. Posted By: Max Brode
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:05 pm 

    ‘Honk is beautiful!’

    (Well… eye of the beholder etc etc)

    [Reply]


  58.   58. Posted By: Max Brode
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:06 pm 

    I would definitely describe the 2014 crop of cars so far as the ‘honk regulation generation’…

    [Reply]


  59.   59. Posted By: darren
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:10 pm 

    Fugly

    [Reply]


  60.   60. Posted By: George Alaimo
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:14 pm 

  61.   61. Posted By: TDKRs
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:15 pm 

    I suppose it’s too obvious to go with penis nose then??

    [Reply]


  62.   62. Posted By: Rufus
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:15 pm 

    Gearbox Sniffer,
    Menthol nose (all the cars look like they are about to sneeze, with the exception of the Lotus, which already has.)
    Droopsnoot,
    E.D. nose (E.D. short for gentleman’s ‘disfunctional’ problems)
    Caution Trip hazard,
    Biggus Dickus

    [Reply]


  63.   63. Posted By: Gaz Boy
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:18 pm 

    Remember Gonzo from The Muppets? How about a gonzo-nose or gonzo-mobile?

    [Reply]

    oddball Reply:

    +1…….we are now entering the muppet era

    [Reply]


  64.   64. Posted By: Dingle Dell
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:20 pm 

    The clever Monty Python boys infiltrated the FIA last year.

    [Reply]


  65.   65. Posted By: GIf
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:21 pm 

    Ferrari looks like a Tapir

    [Reply]


  66.   66. Posted By: Paul
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:22 pm 

    The Mclaren looks like a Warthog from the front view.

    [Reply]


  67.   67. Posted By: Matthew Booth
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:24 pm 

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kilroy_was_here

    [Reply]

    ManOnWheels Reply:

    Kilroy noses – what a great idea!

    [Reply]


  68.   68. Posted By: Jota180
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:26 pm 

    Oh, I dunno – How about

    ‘sharpies’ or ‘nibs’ or ‘nib noses’ or ‘probes’ [in a Gareth Cheeseman accent] :)

    [Reply]


  69.   69. Posted By: Andrew Carter
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:29 pm 

    I think you’re opening up quite the can of worms here James, most descriptions I’ve seen would get you sacked from the BBC if you said them on air!

    [Reply]


  70.   70. Posted By: AMC
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:29 pm 

    McLaren – Pinocchio

    Lotus – The Claw/The Pincer

    [Reply]


  71.   71. Posted By: Leigh Woolford
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:32 pm 

    I think the McLaren nosecone looks like the Alien that burst from John Hurt’s chest..

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Only the alien was far more attractive :)

    [Reply]


  72.   72. Posted By: Sylvester
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:32 pm 

    Hello James / Fellow readers,

    If we are looking for a common reference point.

    Then the comic series “Asterix ” would be a perfect fit as all characters ( Most ) hav a large and weird shaped nose, but each different from one another as with this years F1 cars.

    Invite fellow readers to match the characters to the F1 teams.
    A few suggestions are below.

    Asterix – Ferrari
    Obelix –
    Getafix — Mclaren
    Dogmatix – Mercedes ( Roscoe )
    Vitalstatistix – Lotus F1
    Cacafonix –
    Geriatrix – Williams ( Oldest member in the village )
    AntiClimax – Force India ( Always lose out in the climax )
    Fulliautomatix – Redbull
    Semiautomatix –
    Unhygienix –
    BActeria –

    The wiki link to view the description of each characters is given below.

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Asterix_characters

    Asterix along with a F1 or 2014 prefix suffix. would be my suggestion.

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Isn’t Ferrari the oldest? Williams would be Downward Helix.

    [Reply]


  73.   73. Posted By: Vinay
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:55 pm 

    @lotus = forklift
    @williams = medecinedropper
    @mercedes = middlefinger

    [Reply]


  74.   74. Posted By: Rats
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:56 pm 

    Gonzos,
    Mclaren its ronzo and gonzo.
    Ferrari its Alonso and gonzo.
    Its a bit of a muppet design.

    [Reply]

    hero_was_senna Reply:

    Yes I like the Gonzo name.

    Although I’m doubting the BBC would be allowed to describe the Lotus one as a “camel-toe”..

    [Reply]

    Elie Reply:

    Thats what I call the E 22. Kimi would never have left with that in mind

    [Reply]


  75.   75. Posted By: Karl Reid
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 5:57 pm 

    The perfect opportunity for some F1 teams to target Ann Summers for nose tip sponsorship I’d say….. No more need to elaborate, one thinks :-)

    [Reply]

    Rich C Reply:

    Too local a reference. I had to google it. Interesting site…

    [Reply]

    Simon Lord Reply:

    Or maybe Surtees’ old sponsor from the 1970s could re-enter F1?

    [Reply]

    Optimaximal Reply:

    Someone was way ahead of you!

    https://twitter.com/ann_summers/status/427856193386582016

    [Reply]

    Karl Reid Reply:

    I still claim ownership of that idea as I tweeted it 40 mins before Ann Summers ;-) look at my time stamp 16:49 yesterday, their tweet 17:30 :-P

    https://twitter.com/muddytalker/status/427845831216332800

    [Reply]


  76.   76. Posted By: Sland
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:00 pm 

    Aardvark

    [Reply]


  77.   77. Posted By: Neil Jenney
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:05 pm 

    How about calling it the “Thesenewregsdontreallyfitwithour2013aerophilosophybutweregoingtomakeitworkbecausewerescaredoflookingsillyifwegoradicalandgetleftineveryoneswake” look or TNRDRFWOTAPBWGTMIWBWSOLSIWGRAGLIEW for short?

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Penalty: Out of bounds.

    [Reply]

    HerrE Reply:

    Withdrawn! Only out of mind.

    [Reply]


  78.   78. Posted By: Jason
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:08 pm 

    Wing clipped! In more ways thn one but most notably the wings.

    [Reply]


  79.   79. Posted By: Nigel
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:11 pm 

    Just as well the Torro Rosso hadn’t been launched when you posted this, or you would have got rather more NSFW suggestions.

    Actually, NSF-F1 describes the looks of most of these cars.

    [Reply]


  80.   80. Posted By: dren
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:15 pm 

    DDN and SDN

    Double d— nose and single d— nose. Easy peasy.

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Digit?

    [Reply]


  81.   81. Posted By: seifenkistler
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:22 pm 

  82.   82. Posted By: Bayan
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:27 pm 

    The Webbos (except ferrari and lotus). They remind me of Webber’s finger to Seb in last year’s malaysian GP.

    [Reply]


  83.   83. Posted By: Ahmad
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:33 pm 

    Apart from Lotus, I would call them “beak”, “eagle beak”, “vulture beak”.

    For the Lotus nose: “fangs”.

    Before this year, the last ugly nose was the Williams with the “Walrus”. That was terrible to watch and made no impression on the clockwatch either.

    [Reply]

    Ahmad Reply:

    Or maybe, “claws” for Lotus.

    [Reply]

    Ken Reply:

    Lotus: Twin Beaks
    For the others, beaks which come to mind are pelican and goose. Haven’t seen the Red Bull yet, but there could be a kookaburra there.

    [Reply]


  84.   84. Posted By: james
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:44 pm 

    Lotus “The thing they use to get stuff out of horses hooves” nose?

    Mclaren “basking Shark” nose?

    [Reply]


  85.   85. Posted By: Charlie
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:45 pm 

    I heard from the Ted Kravitz post that the air intakes had been designed and mandated by RedBull? Am I missing something here?

    [Reply]


  86.   86. Posted By: luqa
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:47 pm 

    Lotus obviously is a Tusker, but hopefully quicker than an elephant.
    The Ferrari F14AT (Fix It Again Tony ) looks as though the nose dropped off and while Tony was gluing it back on, it just drooped down to its current flaccid position- Mama Mia!
    Mclaren: dog with big ears about to take off
    Williams: Aardvark
    Sauber: looks reasonable, too early to tell though ditto Force India

    [Reply]


  87.   87. Posted By: Dave Deacon
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:47 pm 

    ‘Durante’ noses from the famous Jimmy Durante…

    [Reply]


  88.   88. Posted By: Dave Deacon
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:50 pm 

    I forgot to add the other names ‘The Schnoz’ and ‘The Great Schnozzola’…

    [Reply]


  89.   89. Posted By: Uppili
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:51 pm 

    The fact that F1 cars have become a laughing stock even among hard core F1 fans is testament to how badly this aerodynamic formula is.

    I am curious why no F1 teams raised this aesthetic issue and moved quickly to fix it last year? All of them are pretty much only offering lip service right now…

    [Reply]


  90.   90. Posted By: Bryan
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:53 pm 

    Definitely the Proboscis era. Torro Rosso in particular looks like Proboscis Monkey!!

    [Reply]


  91.   91. Posted By: Kev
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:53 pm 

    [mod]

    Barry’s as in Barry Manillow

    or the Maninose

    [Reply]


  92.   92. Posted By: cyeh
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:57 pm 

    Noo Noo nose car (Teletubbies vacuum :D )

    [Reply]


  93.   93. Posted By: Richard
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 6:59 pm 

    Which cartoon his nose would start growing when they were lieing? That is the perfect nickname for these new generation of F1 cars.

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Suddenly I feel old :(

    [Reply]


  94.   94. Posted By: Jeff
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 7:05 pm 

    a couple suggestions;

    - the “uh hum,” as in the clearing of throat, one eyebrow raised, “no what i mean, nudge nudge,” nose.

    - the “RE,” as in rectal examiner, or “examiner”

    - the “Space Probe,” again, going with the rectal exam theme here

    … speaking of, do no look up rectal exam on wikipedia unless you want to be exposed to a horribly intrusive medical drawing… although, this image will come to mind the first time one of those noses shoves into someones diffuser

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Never-mind Wikipedia: Whatever you do do not – I repeat DO NOT – look up rectal exam on Google Images.

    [Reply]

    HerrE Reply:

    We’re on deep water here.
    So I still refuse to use prepuce (it may abuse).

    [Reply]


  95.   95. Posted By: Nick
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 7:06 pm 

    Pokey.

    “Squeezed by Romain Grosjean, Hamilton was left with nowhere to go, and as the wheels of their pokey new f1 cars touched Grosjean was launched off the back of Sergio Perez’s Pokey Force India before coming crashing down on the pokey nose of Fernando Alonso’s Ferrari.”

    [Reply]


  96.   96. Posted By: Aelfwald
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 7:16 pm 

    From the front the Ferrari reminds me of Ja Ja Binks from Star Wars.

    [Reply]


  97.   97. Posted By: vassilis
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 7:22 pm 

    What about ERNs (Eyebrow Raising Noses)? It works in two ways… :P

    [Reply]


  98.   98. Posted By: Shaboopi
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 7:24 pm 

    I’m surprised no one has said this yet, but the majority of these new cars look like Wile E Coyote. I wonder which will be the roadrunner…

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    The blue one?

    Well spotted anyway :)

    [Reply]


  99.   99. Posted By: Jeff
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 7:54 pm 

    I’ve got it.. the proctologist

    [Reply]


  100.   100. Posted By: AlexD
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:00 pm 

    James, I think we are solving a wrong problem. Instead of trying to find the right name for something that is ultimately ugly, we should really understand why on earth we have them. People that come up with rules should really see a bigger pictures and understand what effect a certain rule will have. Why to be so short sighted? Sometimes I struggle to understand how a sport so professional and sharp can come with something as disgraceful as this. It is a shame to be a F1 lately…………..

    [Reply]


  101.   101. Posted By: iGOR BdA
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:02 pm 

    GONZO from muppet babies!

    [Reply]


  102.   102. Posted By: Simon Wilson
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:04 pm 

    Just call them “Vettel’s Finger”

    [Reply]

    Martin Reply:

    Ahh, you beat me to it, but I posted it in reference to the launch of Toro Rosso above ;-)
    Regards,
    Martin

    [Reply]


  103.   103. Posted By: JimmiCynic
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:11 pm 

    [mod]
    perhaps we borrow other bastardized terms. Since the front wings have odd bits stuck on them called Winglets, the new ‘safety’ noses have even more awkward bits called Noselets. Or Schnozlets. Or Snotlets. Or Spikelets. Or Drooplets. Or Tusklets. Exact term would depend on the specific car being deprecated.

    When describing the full field on the starting grid: FFE. Full Frontal Embarrassment.

    [Reply]


  104.   104. Posted By: Darren D
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:12 pm 

    Technoz(es)

    This year’s Technoz cars host an array of dazzling new technology and signature noses that offer a distinct demarcation from past F1 formulae.

    Noztech

    F1 wind tunnels have been blowing hard to develop the ultimate Noztech to solve the latest technical regulation riddle.

    Nozolution (also Nozolutionary)

    This year’s Nozolution is the most outwardly distinctive signal of change in an F1 year wrought with technical advancement.

    Rhinoplaz Tech

    F1 media and fans are having a hard time looking past the latest Rhinoplaz Tech. In a sport desperately clinging to the glamour of a romantic and deadly past, a focus on aesthetics is undermining the importance of the revolution taking place under the skin of its 2014 championship contenders.

    “Did you see the nose on that Columbus guy? New World please…the dude is UGLY!”

    [Reply]

    HerrE Reply:

    I think the Technoz(es) is a good one!

    [Reply]


  105.   105. Posted By: oskaalb
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:16 pm 

    OMG, I’ve just seen a picture of the new Toro Rosso STR9. Now, that’s the real Gonzo!

    [Reply]

    HerrE Reply:

    Yes, truly embarrassing!!

    [Reply]


  106.   106. Posted By: Smeghead
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:19 pm 

    How about Trans-Am wheelarch nostrils himself?

    I humbly submit: “Rimmer”.

    https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQn7cZYeqRX1_njEsEHLp-oII7EjPQl_78f5FbY_N4J7IC7koua

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    With an “H” for hybrid too :)

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Yes I know “H” is actually short for hologram, but just go with it ;)

    [Reply]


  107.   107. Posted By: Abdul Ahad Jajja
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:37 pm 

  108.   108. Posted By: Dave
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:38 pm 

    I feel the mclaren and sauber look like basking sharks. The Toro Rosso looks like a female play toy.

    The name I think should be applied to the Ferrari is the Door Stop. It looks exactly like a door stop

    [Reply]


  109.   109. Posted By: Gizmo
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:40 pm 

    When I was stationed in the UK at RAF Upper Heyford, our planes (F-111) were nicknamed the Aardvark. I think that is a reasonable name for the new nose design.

    I like dolphin nose, but looking at some of the cars, that would be an insult to such an intelligent mamal.

    [Reply]


  110.   110. Posted By: Mary
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:51 pm 

    A friend suggested “GonzoNose” which I quite like (after the Muppets character).

    [Reply]


  111.   111. Posted By: Lionel Flaneur
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:56 pm 

    Chad. As in “What, no downforce?”

    [Reply]


  112.   112. Posted By: Hoarsewhisperer
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 8:59 pm 

    I can’t help think of the muppet ‘Beaker’ when I look at the new noses. In it’s favor, there is no inuendo so it’s fine for general audience and it rolls off the tongue. For example: “Kimi missed his pitlane mark and and is driving around to….wait…it looks like he going to use that beaker nose to cut the line for ice cream!”

    http://www.claireramus.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/beaker-muppet2.jpg

    [Reply]


  113.   113. Posted By: Andrew
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:09 pm 

    Hollywood nose. Because all of them look like they’ve had work done.

    [Reply]


  114.   114. Posted By: alx
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:10 pm 

    Lotus : Snake-tougued

    F1 Ugly

    [Reply]


  115.   115. Posted By: clint
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:13 pm 

    Remember the cartoon the snorks?

    [Reply]

    clint Reply:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I4ALjDSsMd4

    [Reply]


  116.   116. Posted By: Alexx
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:14 pm 

    the Beetle-Juice nose

    [Reply]


  117.   117. Posted By: Stephen
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:15 pm 

    Imo they should be called the ‘diversion nose’ because they’ve diverted the attention away from the dreadful double points rule!

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Now if only we had something to distract us from the double points rule and the noses we’d be set.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TKmm7oGyPHw

    That should do it :)

    [Reply]


  118.   118. Posted By: Tom Power
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:26 pm 

    As commented earlier a simple generic term for the noses has to be ‘snozzle’ or ‘snazzle’.

    [Reply]

    Darren D Reply:

    Snazzle! Love it!

    Interview with design engineer…

    “After we solved the basic airflow challenge we decided to add a little snazzle up front spice things up.”

    [Reply]


  119.   119. Posted By: Adam
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:36 pm 

    Having just seen the new Torro Roso it looks like the “Kilroy” graffiti nose!

    [Reply]


  120.   120. Posted By: DeWeberis
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:38 pm 

    I was thinking if some team has the idea of a disposable nose. In the warm-up lap some car would crash into the back of his teammate to castrate / get rid of the fallic nosecone and get an aerodynamic advantage along the race.
    It might work with all cars so far, except Ferrari and Mercedes.
    As far as I know there is no punishment for finishing the race without some part of the nose, given that its still inside the weight limit.

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    So…Gecko noses?

    [Reply]


  121.   121. Posted By: GvH
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:41 pm 

    It’s clearly the wotno!

    http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a313/blower220/chad–wotno.jpg

    [Reply]

    Random 79 Reply:

    Ah yes…Kilroy ;)

    [Reply]


  122.   122. Posted By: Paul H
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:49 pm 

    Toro Rosso is clearly modelled on Gonzo from the muppets. As I expect Red Bull to be exactly the same no idea what to call that.

    [Reply]


  123.   123. Posted By: Lee
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 9:59 pm 

    The Gonzo Nose

    [Reply]

    Olivier Reply:

    +1

    Torro Rosso, Williams and McLaren clearly went for the Gonzo look!

    http://muppet.wikia.com/wiki/Gonzo

    [Reply]


  124.   124. Posted By: nick
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 10:00 pm 

    This is like FIFA introducing huge changes to football, like making the goals wider, or changing the number of players in a team, but the pre-season talk on the internet being all about the players’ haircuts. I blame Williams for starting it all a few years ago by creating a car with such an obvious animal identity.

    [Reply]


  125.   125. Posted By: Billy
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 10:04 pm 

    Hampton? Hampton Wick? Three card trick?

    Sorry James couldn’t resist :-)

    [Reply]


  126.   126. Posted By: Nano
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 10:08 pm 

    The Australian press labelled the Mclaren an “echidna” (An Australian Anteater with spines)

    [Reply]


  127.   127. Posted By: Ronnie
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 10:10 pm 

    I adore Robert Kubica and miss him, but sorry his name was the first thing popped into my mind when seeing those cars. So I’d call all of them “Robert”

    [Reply]


  128.   128. Posted By: Sufyaan
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 10:15 pm 

    I prefer ‘Dolphin nose’. Its a shorter name than the others and maybe better suited if used in a professional environment. Well, better than the others for a start :)

    [Reply]


  129.   129. Posted By: zootrees
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 10:23 pm 

    The Alain Prost Era

    [Reply]


  130.   130. Posted By: Ian
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 10:28 pm 

    Have not gone through all comments but lets not mess about condom nose ( if only the durex were back as a sponsor )

    [Reply]


  131.   131. Posted By: Kaki
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 10:32 pm 

    Aardvark is the best hahaha!!!

    [Reply]


  132.   132. Posted By: jeffrey
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 10:45 pm 

    From a punk archives:

    Joy Division
    The Buzzcocks
    Sex Pistols
    Stiff Little Fingers

    …etc etc

    [Reply]


  133.   133. Posted By: John
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 10:54 pm 

  134.   134. Posted By: Roy
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 11:08 pm 

    Ferrari: The Hoover

    Lotus: The Earwig

    Mclaren: Flaring Nostril

    Williams – Proboscis monkey

    [Reply]


  135.   135. Posted By: Marc Saunders
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 11:22 pm 

    I would propose Proboscis monkey, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Proboscis_monkey but it´s name is too complex to be popular. In Spanish it sounds like nose-monkey and if you see the pictures on the link it is the most approximate nose to that of the cars.

    [Reply]


  136.   136. Posted By: KRB
        Date: January 27th, 2014 @ 11:53 pm 

    Shazbot noses.

    The curse word used by Mork, of Mork and Mindy fame. That character has a few things in common with some frequently heard comparisons surrounding the new look noses.

    He’s an alien who also hoovered drinks up with his finger.

    Nanu, nanu!

    [Reply]


  137.   137. Posted By: D Vega
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 12:21 am 

    Ferrari: The prancing platypus.
    Lotus: The touring fork.
    Mclaren: Tanager.

    [Reply]


  138.   138. Posted By: meridabob
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 12:21 am 

    The Lotus looks like a ball joint separator, so, the BJS (JPS?) with the rest seemingly waiting for one.

    [Reply]


  139.   139. Posted By: Surefunk
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 12:38 am 

    Have I smoked something funny or does the mclaren look like a Horse??

    Check out the sidepod intakes as ‘EYES’ then follow the ‘horse nose’ down to it’s nostrils.

    Brilliant!!!

    [Reply]


  140.   140. Posted By: John
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 12:42 am 

    They have come up with new ways of getting money out of sponsors. They are targeting surgeons.

    This year it will be sponsored by
    rhinoplasty surgeon association, called NosesRus.com.

    Next year, we will get a new rear end design sposored by the Proctologist Surgeons association.

    RearsRus.com ( I suggest you don`t google that )

    Feel free to practice your repair skills using the Surgeon Simulator at

    sawbones.com.

    [Reply]


  141.   141. Posted By: Mike Taberner
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 12:43 am 

    Brewer’s Droop…not only what it looks like..it’s also the same effect they have on me!

    [Reply]


  142.   142. Posted By: IP
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 12:50 am 

    I’ll be referring to this as the “Snout” era.

    [Reply]


  143.   143. Posted By: Notna
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 1:02 am 

    What about Pinocchio noses?

    Hey, whatever happens, someone’s going to win by an ugly nose for sure!

    [Reply]

    CYeo Reply:

    Well, some have been caught flat out lying on occasion…

    [Reply]


  144.   144. Posted By: Carl
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 1:20 am 

    1) FALCON

    Cone in peregrine falcon nostril allows air to enter by disrupting airflow.

    Falcons are known for their high speed flight, and the Peregrine is thought to be the fastest bird, accurately clocked at 90 meters per second. A contender is the Prairie Falcon. Incidentally, in the making of airplanes, especially jets, humans came onto a problem. As planes got faster and faster, the engines started choking out at a certain speed. It seems that the air, instead of going into the cowl of the engine, encountered a wall of still air and engine cowl and so split and went around the engine. Puzzled, the researchers wondered how the falcons could still breathe at such incredible speeds. Looking at the falcon’s nostrils, they found the answer. In the opening of the nostril is a small cone that protrudes a bit. Fashioning a similar cone in the opening of the jet engine, they discovered that the air could pass into the engine even at great speed. Once again a human invention is preceded by an animal adaptation.” (Chaffee Zoo 2007)

    “The air pressure from a 200 mph (320 km/h) dive could possibly damage a bird’s lungs, but small bony tubercles in a falcon’s nostrils guide the shock waves of the air entering the nostrils (compare intake ramps and inlet cones of jet engines), enabling the bird to breathe more easily while diving by reducing the change in air pressure.” (Wikipedia 2008) –Asknature.org

    2) Xenomorph

    [Reply]


  145.   145. Posted By: Kevin
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 1:25 am 

    Hideous, just plain hideous. Not sure if they are safer because they can be used as a lance or as a wedge to puncture or launch their opponents respectively.

    [Reply]


  146.   146. Posted By: Christopher Cathles
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 1:30 am 

    Having produced and scripted for Radio Two and put words into narrators mouths, I feel at a bit of an advantage. I would suggest for James’ 5-Live commentary that 2014 is the year of
    “Snouts’n'Snorters”, the latter referring to back-end single unblown exhaust sounds (of cars, that is)

    [Reply]


  147.   147. Posted By: Marc Saunders
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 1:38 am 

  148.   148. Posted By: Oliver
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 1:46 am 

  149.   149. Posted By: Rick Cook
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 1:48 am 

    Ferrar Jar Binks.

    [Reply]


  150.   150. Posted By: Samo
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 1:50 am 

  151.   151. Posted By: Matthew Cheshire
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 2:13 am 

    Hands down, It has to be an Echidna’s beak.

    http://roytorkington.net/blog/aussie-wildlife-echidna/

    I saw an echidna last week and had an overwhelming urge to paint it blue and put a number on it.

    Echidnas lay eggs so there’s a natural headline for under performing teams too.

    [Reply]

    HerrE Reply:

    Please try to catch an echidna, I would love to see a blue one!!

    [Reply]


  152.   152. Posted By: Jako
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 2:26 am 

    2014 – Must be the year of the Fertilised Nose.

    They have grown enormous.

    cheers

    [Reply]


  153.   153. Posted By: Mike Hutchison
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 3:46 am 

    Mclaren nose – rams head!!!

    [Reply]


  154.   154. Posted By: Mark V
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 3:55 am 

    Big ugly noses = CLOWN CARS.

    Along with the new double points rule, teams now get bonus points for squeezing the most drivers into their car.

    [Reply]


  155.   155. Posted By: Horoldo
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 4:21 am 

    F1 2014 – The year of the Honker / Schnoz / Beak

    [Reply]


  156.   156. Posted By: Horoldo
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 4:26 am 

  157.   157. Posted By: abnormal jest
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 4:44 am 

    Noses that are ridiculous in so many ways: Comedy Noses or Cartoon Noses. These are both generic enough and broadcastable!

    [Reply]


  158.   158. Posted By: Tim Duckworth
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 5:00 am 

    Kilroy was here: This was a graffito, of unknown origin but used predominantly by members of the US and UK military and predominantly during WWII. It was often combined with an earlier cartoon image, known as Chad, although the two aren’t related apart from that conjunction.

    [Reply]


  159.   159. Posted By: Goob
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 5:02 am 

    Booger Cars

    [Reply]


  160.   160. Posted By: Matt
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 5:13 am 

    tragic rhinoplasty!

    [Reply]


  161.   161. Posted By: Michael
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 5:38 am 

    Lotus: the clothes peg

    [Reply]

    James Allen Reply:

    Yes!

    [Reply]

    Peter Freeman Reply:

    VERY good!

    As for the long protruding front ends they somehow remind me
    of a rooster… now a rooster has another name, but I can’t quite bring it to mind… so Rooster Nose it is :)

    [Reply]


  162.   162. Posted By: rob
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 5:48 am 

    I have only seen a few of the new cars so far, but the Ferrari, and the McLaren conjure up only one description:- UGLY! rooooly rooooly UGLY! Function before form is O.K., but there are limits. A squashed toothpaste tube is not a pretty sight, when masquerading as a state of the art racing car

    [Reply]


  163.   163. Posted By: Jacob
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 6:34 am 

    Phallic

    [Reply]


  164.   164. Posted By: Dmitry
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 6:40 am 

    I am all for Kenneth Williams =)

    My own version will be – Cuttlefish or someone else from Sepiida order. They can arrange their tentacles in any shapes – be it a single protrusion or a twin Lotus-like…

    [Reply]


  165.   165. Posted By: kenneth chapman
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 6:49 am 

    maybe a ‘pino’ as a diminution of ‘pinocchio’. or ‘hooter’ a slang word not currently in use for ‘nose’.

    [Reply]


  166.   166. Posted By: Wes
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 6:51 am 

    Aquiline or roman or eagle all terms for a humans crooked nose

    [Reply]


  167.   167. Posted By: CYeo
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 7:22 am 

    I think everybody has forgotten about the gharial/gavial – a fish eating crocodile.

    Long pointed snout anyone?

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gharial

    [Reply]


  168.   168. Posted By: Optimaximal
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 7:47 am 

    Thought of another one!

    ‘Schlong Wheelbase’!

    [Reply]


  169.   169. Posted By: keith hardy
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 8:16 am 

    ROAD KILL

    [Reply]


  170.   170. Posted By: tk
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 8:46 am 

    Bishop’s Nose!

    [Reply]


  171.   171. Posted By: moxlox
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 9:33 am 

    My wife coined the name Pinocchio nose for the majority of these proboscis.

    Upon seeing the new Red Bull she called that one Squidward after the Spongebob Squarepants character.

    So there you have it. In my house anyway!

    [Reply]


  172.   172. Posted By: Merlinghnd
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 9:52 am 

    Not sure if it has been said before but I reckon the “Pointers”, ie “that was the first of the pointers”

    May not be catchy but a singleword that everyone might get, it might work.

    Can I patent it?

    [Reply]


  173.   173. Posted By: Ruthy
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 9:58 am 

    I think they should be called…..FIRE-DRAGONS with each team car given a name like e.g.

    Red Bull – Racing Ruby
    McLaren – Silver Flash

    Ferrari – Red Fireball etc

    [Reply]


  174.   174. Posted By: Clarks4WheelDrift
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 10:12 am 

    Misfits.

    From my son, his fav board game. You mix up characters from hat,head,body,left leg,right leg. He says the car looks like a misfit, like someone built the tip, someone else the nose, someone else the wing etc

    [Reply]


  175.   175. Posted By: Peter Freeman
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 10:16 am 

    An aardvark is far too benign, not this is an aardvark forged in steel and on steroids, this is the F14 TERMINITOR

    Ants everywhere now live if fear…

    [Reply]


  176.   176. Posted By: Kenneth M'Boy
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 11:16 am 

    Bravo and thank you, James, for the recognition on my comments. Hopefully I will get to proudly laugh my head off when I hear you on ONE HD saying “Jughead wins by a nose”.

    I also would like to add my support to some of the other great comments. I liked the Renault forklift, Kenneth Williams for the McLaren (obviously – what a great name). The Michael Jackson reference made me laugh but I think the best buzzword is with the reference to the Muppets.

    Perhaps this title should also be given to the FIA officials who administered the dimensional rulings that have turned this years Formula One cars into a comedy of errors, what a bunch of muppets.

    [Reply]


  177.   177. Posted By: bbobeckyj
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 11:26 am 

    Snout.
    Semantically correct, short and punchy with the right amount of inherent derogatory feeling or emotion, and applicable to all cars.

    [Reply]


  178.   178. Posted By: Sam
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 11:44 am 

  179.   179. Posted By: JPole
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 2:23 pm 

    ‘Probe’ nose, short for proboscis. Here’s an example – http://cdn.discoverwildlife.com/sites/default/files/images/proboscis_monkey.jpg

    [Reply]


  180.   180. Posted By: Søren Kühle
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 2:42 pm 

    Big dippers :)

    [Reply]


  181.   181. Posted By: Geezer
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 2:50 pm 

    I think ‘gopping’ covers them all nicely.

    [Reply]


  182.   182. Posted By: Jeff
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 3:26 pm 

    dilnose… wait for it to sink in…

    [Reply]


  183.   183. Posted By: Jim Scott
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 4:13 pm 

    They remind me of the iconic image from WWII…

    “Kilroy was here”

    The Kilroy nose.

    [Reply]


  184.   184. Posted By: George Alaimo
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 5:51 pm 

    Hummingbirds

    [Reply]


  185.   185. Posted By: Divesh
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 6:42 pm 

    Hi James.

    Surely the FIA must have known how the teams would interpret regulations regarding the nose?

    The blame must lie with them surely, has anybody from the FIA commented on the nose designs?

    [Reply]


  186.   186. Posted By: Scott Printup
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 7:37 pm 

    “The Alain Prost”

    [Reply]


  187.   187. Posted By: fox
        Date: January 28th, 2014 @ 10:20 pm 

    They all are ugly.

    [Reply]


  188.   188. Posted By: Adelaide
        Date: January 29th, 2014 @ 12:12 pm 

    James, I’ve got it! I knew the Ferrari reminded me of something – or someone:
    http://www.starwarshelmets.com/sideshow/Side_Greedo_cc02.jpg
    Greedo from Star Wars! Even the name fits, hehe… :D

    [Reply]


  189.   189. Posted By: Gergely
        Date: January 29th, 2014 @ 1:20 pm 

    Simple. Antbeaters.

    [Reply]


  190.   190. Posted By: Bru72
        Date: January 29th, 2014 @ 7:31 pm 

    The Ferrari and the Merc shouldn’t be in this topic, as they look good.

    [Reply]


  191.   191. Posted By: Joseph
        Date: January 29th, 2014 @ 7:37 pm 

    They’ve got to be called Gonzo noses surely!

    [Reply]


  192.   192. Posted By: andrew
        Date: January 29th, 2014 @ 9:34 pm 

    How about:

    MOSQUITO! Nosed.

    or

    THE WILD MEN OF BORNEO!

    [Reply]


  193.   193. Posted By: BBC Sport - F1: New Caterham Nose Design Prompts 'Huge' Reaction
        Date: February 19th, 2014 @ 1:11 pm 

    [...] Some nice comparisons here, actually: Help us Find the perfect buzzword for these “new look” F1 carsJames Allen on F1 THe Toro Rosso looks like Squidward I like the Merc nose, [...]

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